An Open Heart: Life Lessons From God

                        

Everyone knows that adversity and heartaches are as much a part of life as breathing itself. All of us have had moments in life when the good days seem like a distant memory and the bad days cause a struggle that is nearly unbearable. If you claim belief in Jesus and have confidence in his power, you can take comfort and draw strength from him. Many times, during these dark phases of life, questions fill our minds; “why me?, why now?” or “what did I do to cause this?” Other times we find ourselves hard at work seeking the Lord’s will and trying diligently to carry it out with obedience. During these times, the pain is not necessarily felt in the process we go through to do what he asks but is very closely tied to the blessings that result from that obedience.

I recall a time when I was trying really hard to follow the leading of the Holy Spirit by supporting a close friend with her decision to move out of state. She had endured many difficult times in her life before I met her one year ago. She had a deeply compassionate heart and a true love for God but the wounds from her past had yet to heal. As I was getting to know her, I felt a connection that I believed was created by God and placed there to allow me to minister to her. Month after month went by until, despite her fear of allowing anyone near, we became close friends. An opportunity arose for her to move in with her brother, reduce her debt and even go back to school. In order to take advantage of this opportunity, she would have to uproot her life and move hundreds of miles away. I prayed that God would provide her with healing, protection and provision and I knew that this move was part of his plan.

When she told me of her plan to move, I was filled with mixed emotions. I knew it would be the beginning to a positively changed life for her. I also knew that I ran the very real risk losing contact with a friend that I had grown to love like a sister. So, when I thought about the direction both of ours lives were going and God’s will for each of us, I found myself asking ‘why’. Not so much why she had to move. I knew he wanted to answer my prayers to prosper her and this was his way of doing it. I asked ‘why’ for more personal reasons. I knew God had called me to show love, open my heart and life as well as speak the word he gives for specific people and do for them according to his leading. The blessings I see in others as well as my own life are incredible. Seeing God set a person up on his foundation and strengthening them to stand on their own and then fly is awesome! To be allowed to be any part of that is truly overwhelming.

Now, with that said, my question is, “Lord, why does following your will and gaining so much blessing have to be tied to so much pain-pain that almost takes my breath away at times”. He gently reminded me, “You can’t have one without the other. Vulnerability is necessary to connect at such a deep level, but it also allows for pain. If you take the vulnerability away, you also take away the ability to ever do what I have called you to do.” It was at that moment that I understood the term ‘bittersweet’. Even though I still felt the intense sadness of loss, I also felt the Lord pouring his love on me and through me. I knew that he had both of us in his keeping. I didn’t know what the future would bring but I knew that the Lord has an abundance of blessings set aside for each of us. I realized that the key to his blessings wasn’t necessarily in getting to a particular destination in life but in following God’s will and guidance throughout the journey to that destination.


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We are all meant to REALLY live

Pretty Walls-Depression in Disguised

                                     

As night falls, Carey stands in her closet trying to decide on what to wear. In just a couple of hours she would be in a room full of friends, family and other well wishers congratulating her on her latest and greatest achievement. She had finally reached her goal of becoming an associate in the highest rated law firm in Branson County. She had dreamed of this day and worked so hard and now it was here! This bright, shining moment was not the only envious aspect of her life. No, Carey was the girl everyone liked and wanted to be around. In fact, many people considered her a “bestie” because she had a pleasant smile, contagious laughter and an ability to put others at ease. Carey had a dream life-one that others would view as having every quality necessary to make a person happy.

Yet, as she stood alone in her closet debating on whether to wear the little black Vera Wang dress or go more casual in her Lucky jeans, an overwhelming emptiness overcame her as she melted into a heap on the floor, sobbing uncontrollably! She had moments like this; many more than anyone ever knew. She tried to do all the ‘right things’. She got an education, landed the dream job, lived in a reputable neighborhood, had the finest of things but she still could not fill the dark hole that remained deep inside that seemed to never go away.

At times this pit in her soul seemed to be attached to a voice in her head that even taunted her with thoughts of, “You’re nothing. You’ll never be good enough! No one really loves you, just what you can do for them. You are nothing, have nothing and will always be nothing!” As she tried to pull herself together, stretching and pulling to get herself up out of the floor, she stood upright and met herself face to face in the mirror on the closet door. Before she knew it, she heard a loud voice say, “and you’re ugly too”. Then she realized it was her own! "How could this be? Why do I not feel any better? After all I’ve done and all the work I’ve put toward making such a great life, I should feel great about it, about myself!" Yet, nothing had really changed on the inside. She never told anyone of the struggle she dealt with on a daily basis. “No one would understand. They’ll think I’m a freak or just not want to be around me because it will bring them all down. Then I’ll really be alone! No, you can handle this on your own! So, stop being so weak and get it together!” She told herself this while looking at herself in the mirror. She splashed some cold water on her face, pulled herself together, chose the Vera Wang and continued getting ready for her ‘big night’.

Carey had such a perfect life. How could anything be so serious that would cause such a reaction seemingly out of the blue? The truth is, Carey had a secret. She had wounds from her past that had yet to heal, which were affecting her greatly as an adult. She came from a very strict upbringing and as hard as she tried she never felt completely accepted by her parents, especially her father. She was also a little on the heavy side as far as her weight for her age and height but was meticulous in all her endeavors and made all A’s and B’s in school. Yet, her father would never give her praise and took the ‘tough love’ approach in the thoughts that it would “make her stronger, better” and somehow show his love for her more. He was a very stoic man and did not know how to show affection. As a little girl, Carey would often be at a friends’ house and would watch her friends’ family interact with each other. Many times she would have to leave abruptly saying she suddenly felt nauseous and had to be excused. The reality of it was that she was so envious of the relationship she saw that it overwhelmed her as she burst into tears. “Why can’t that happen to me? Am I so bad that I don’t deserve that? What else do I need to do to be worthy of that kind of love?” These questions never really seemed to be answered and remained with her into adulthood. They are the same questions that would come flooding her mind as a sudden tidal wave from the depths of her soul just to leave her a sniveling mess in the middle of the floor! “I can’t let anyone see me like this! What would they think? Why am I being such a baby? I have everything-a life of which others only dream! No, I’m being silly and just need to get over it!” This is a form of coping she had developed and perfected over time, or so she thought. It worked to keep her going and others from ever knowing about her constant internal turmoil. The problem is that, as long as no one knew, then no one could help. This cycle left her alone with her pain and struggle, empty and lonely.

People put up pretty walls as a façade to hide their pain, guilt and shame. Pretty because these walls are adorn with smiles and sometimes even equipped with laughter, pretty clothes, pretty houses-pretty lives. People build these walls in order to divert attention from the disturbing and sometimes devastating reality of the lives that torment them to an alter existence they believe will be more easily accepted by others.

The above story was fictitious but sadly the situation happens everyday. This is known as depression and avoidance and can lead to serious consequences, self harm and even suicide if extreme enough. People going through this experience tend to not reach out for help and attempt to deal with it on their own as to not ‘bother’ others with their problems. Some even find a kind of comfort in their hidden darkness that would be quite disturbing to the rest of us. This is why it is so important to see the signs and symptoms of depression and act on your loved ones behalf.

Signs of Depression

• difficulty concentrating, remembering details, and making decisions

• fatigue and decreased energy

• feelings of guilt, worthlessness, and/or helplessness

• feelings of hopelessness and/or pessimism

• insomnia, early-morning wakefulness, or excessive sleeping

• irritability, restlessness

• loss of interest in activities or hobbies once pleasurable, including sex

• overeating or appetite loss

• persistent aches or pains, headaches, cramps, or digestive problems that do not ease even with treatment

• persistent sad, anxious, or "empty" feelings

thoughts of suicide, suicide attempts

Warning signs of suicide with depression:

• a sudden switch from being very sad to being very calm or appearing to be happy

• always talking or thinking about death

• clinical depression (deep sadness, loss of interest, trouble sleeping and eating) that gets worse

• having a "death wish," tempting fate by taking risks that could lead to death, like driving through red lights

• losing interest in things one used to care about

• making comments about being hopeless, helpless, or worthless

• putting affairs in order, tying up loose ends, changing a will

• saying things like "It would be better if I wasn't here" or "I want out"

• talking about suicide (killing one's self)

• visiting or calling people one cares about

http://www.webmd.com/depression/guide/detecting-depression

To find help and treatment for you or someone you love call you primary care physician for evaluation or referral to a mental health professional. For help in crisis situations, call 911, local emergency room or the national suicide hotline at 1-800-SUICIDE (1-800-784-2433).

After the crisis, continued support is vital. Local support groups are available and routine counseling therapy is also very important. There is help. There is hope.

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Depression

                         

There is so much pain and sadness out there in the world! Many people deal with depression so strong that it's disabling. These people work with us, living in our neighborhoods, go to our schools and pass us on the street hiding behind sad eyes and forced smiles. People need hope. Those of us that know Jesus can show them that hope if we just take the time to notice their suffering and reach out to them.

Do you know of any ministries that think outside the box?

                               

Thinking of the recent post Pastors Posing as Homeless, I got to thinking of how many other ministries out there have been started by someone who took an approach outside the norm. Do you know of any inspiring people? I'd love to hear from you guys, my MG readers!

God's Materpiece

For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. - Ephesians 2:10

"From a health perspective, our biggest challenge is to cope with the

circumstances of life and its associated stressors along with relationship

stressors in a healthy way. For the most part, our behaviors in response

to these life events and stressors are attempts to meet our most basic

needs of love, acceptance, self worth, security and identity. We have two

options. We can choose to include God in our efforts to manage our life

and stressors, or we can choose to go it alone" states Dale Fletcher , writer for faithandhealthconnections.org.

It is true that our reaction to any situation we face is a form of coping with the stress of that circumstance. We all have a choice in how we react. What we chose is determined in a large part by our beliefs, values and emotional state at the time of the occurance. A strong faith in Jesus Christ and his teachings gives a strong foundation to see circumstances with a perspective of hope. That is not to say that having a Christian faith will guarantee a stressfree, illness free life but scientific studies have proven that having a strong faith results in lower stress and less of the illnesses that come with that stress.

Pastors Posing as Homeless: New Ministry Approach

This photo has become a hot topic on the web recently. The story that goes with it is of a man (Jeremiah Steepek) posing as a homeless person on the street in front of the church in which he was to be the new pastor.

It's a very intriguing story and one that sends a very strong message. "Love one another." There are rumors that the picture is not actually the pastor or the story not totally factual yet the message is still just as real and just as important. To read the story, go here. http://youviewed.com/2013/07/23/homeless-pastor-jeremiah-steepek-teaches-his-new-congregation-a-lesson-in-being-christians/

The above story may or may not be true. Maybe there is a real revolutionary advocate for the homeless named Jeremiah Steepek, maybe not. There is however a real Willie Lyle, pastor/revolutionist right in our very own Tennessee!

  

Tenn. pastor goes undercover as homeless man for week

                     

Before Willie Lyle's first day as pastor of Sango First Methodist Church in Clarksville, TN. he decide to make a bold statement and lasting impression on his new congregation and surrounding community. He spent 4 1/2 days in downtown Clarksville as a homeless man. He learned much of how the general public reacts to the homeless and the issues these people face. He took that first hand knowledge and taught it to his new congregation.

 Read the full article here.  http://www.wbir.com/news/article/279666/2/Tenn-pastor-goes-undercover-as-homeless-man-for-week